You walk up to me with eyes glittering from the spotlights, full of energy and life. We smile, talk and connect.
Energy starts to manifest.
To you, I am this shiny, bright, exotic and ever so interesting new toy.
An energy so bright that you are mesmerised by it.
I represent something you can’t quite put your finger on.
You want to know everything about me so you can try to understand what it is that sits before you.
Your world has never seen something so strange, yet so alluring.
You are as intrigued as you are repulsed.
You really just want to see what parts she has or hasn’t got underneath all those clothes.
You want to know how I “do it”.
You’ve seen people like me in porn and on the internet and see me as this slut that will do anything you want. (You always make sure you clear the internet history afterwards.)
You see me as a fascinating object to marvel at and admire. Constantly bombarding me with comments about my eyes, and looks. Building me up so you can pull the rug out from underneath me in a more spectacular way.
This hybrid between the masculine and the feminine, something different to everything else you have ever fucked before.
You are torn between your desire and social boundaries.
You want to fuck me but you don’t want your friends to know.
You want to fuck me but you don’t want to walk down the street with me.
You want to fuck me but you pretend you don’t know me after we have.
You play your games with me and en-trance me into your shadows.
Not any longer, not anymore.
I am a proud trans-woman.
I am not an object.
I bleed, I breathe, I love, and I feel so fucking deeply.
I am intuitive and I am strong in ways you could never possibly understand.
I am not this toy you keep projecting on to me
I am not some plaything for you when you are drunk and want to experiment.
I am not something that you can touch without my consent.
First and foremost I am a human being just like you.
I learnt a really valuable lesson in my trans journey.
This time I stood up for myself and I will never let someone humiliate me ever again.
As soon as I stood up for myself all the anguish and pain left me.
I felt calmer and stronger.
Now I know how to deal with these situations in the future and it’s an empowering feeling.
No person is ever going to tread upon me again.